SurvivingInfidelity.com^®

We even bought 2 properties here (her country) so we could "retire."

You may want to consult a local attorney about the disposition of these properties before you leave.

Don’t have sex with her after you discover. It can be legally "condoning" it if you live in a US state where you might get an "at fault" divorce.

Dude. I’m so sorry. There aren’t words, but we are here for you.

I’m so sorry. Stay strong. Avoid booze.

Thanks for the replies. I'm still here in Asia and the wife isn't aware I know. The more I re-read her text history the more I realize all her actions are to get close to him: work trips she claimed she wanted to improve her career, solo trips home to visit family, sexy work out fits, exercising after work, etc. She even wanted me to change to look like him: get more tan, grow a beard. etc. She used to hate those things on me.
Anyway, I really don't care about the property here. She pretty much owns those since I'm a foreigner. I'll call it a wash can get out of my marriage with my 401K and pension intact. Arizona is a no-fault divorce state so infidelity doesn't really matter here. We did do a covenant marriage since we both profess Christian beliefs. I can get out of the waiting period for that due to infidelity however. Anyway. Im just researching and plotting. No drinking since I tend to say what is on my mind ha ha.

And yes I'm done with sex with her. All I can think of when she touches me is revulsion at what she did with him. No hysterical bonding here. I just pretend to be tired and stressed. I don't think she minds because she sees sex with me as a chore I think.

So sorry for you.

This breaks my heart reading this. I cannot imagine marrying someone you love and learning they may not have loved you in the same way.

I hope she gets what she deserves.